• And This is Crazy…

      Hey, I’ve never posted a video here, and this is crazy, but here is a crazy bitch video, so watch it maybe. If you enjoyed this let me know in the comments and maybe i’ll start posting some more.        

    crazy lady pic
  • 11 out of 350 Million Facebook Users is not so Bad

    Update: Facebook now has close to a billion users and Sucky Poems has 20 Facebook fans so we’re almost growing proportionately. Of 350 million facebook users, I have just 11 fans But to gain a couple more i’ve got a lot of plans Maybe I should write more to gain a bunch of hits But […]

    facebook pic
  • I had sex with Blake Lively thanks to Tim Ferriss

    This poem is dedicated to Tim Ferriss (@tferriss) for his inspiration. Until last night I could just day dream about getting one of the women on my list whom I can sleep without causing problems with my girlfriend for messing around but the list is of celebs that can never be found until last night when […]

    Blake-Lively
  • I Was Constipated (Parody of I Wanna be Sedated by the Ramones)

    This song has been on my mind since the first time I heard it on the radio.  Not sure why it took so long to get it up here.  Enjoy! Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours ago I was constipated Nothing to do, nowhere to go I was constipated Just get me to the bathroom and put me […]

    constipation-nice way of saying full of crap
  • Dinosaurs in Birthday Hats

    This Sucky Poem is dedicated to Kevin Muldoon @caoimghgin from New Haven for suggesting a sucky poem about dinosaurs in birthday hats.  Not sure where he came up with that one but I don’t ask these questions. We all know many dinosaurs from Barney and Denver to Dino Palaeontologists even found the Futalognkosaurus Dukei which […]

    dinosaur in bday hat
  • How to Fix a PC Computer

    *This poem is dedicated to Mick Campbell from Middlesbrough @MickDude for suggesting the topic of “how to fix a computer”.  You too can have a poem dedicated to you if you send @suckypoems a suggestion for a sucky poem on twitter. Fixing a PC computer is actually quite complex you have to do about a 101 […]

    smash and break computer pc monitor with keyboard[12]
  • What a Prom

    I remember my prom like it happened today i went in style, i wouldn’t have it any other way i got a stretched limo and a corsage for the girl before going in, we took the limo for a whirl I dressed in the fanciest Tux It only cost me a couple hundred bucks we […]

    prom-1
  • Buy A Tux from Tuxedocanada.com

    If you’re looking to buy a nice tux, then you are in luck i just launched a shop to buy a tux, its the top you can get jackets, pants, shirts and a vest but it’s the prices that you will like best. This is just a cheesy ad for the new site i’m hoping […]

  • The Inspiration For My Poetry

    i’ve been thinking of some really sucky poems to post but people wonder if they are inspired by my life the most Then I have to think twice about writing tons of stuff like mommy and daddy not loving me enough or the years i spent locked in a cellar and how about the beatings, […]

    inspiration
  • How We Ended Up Like This

    It wasn’t because of my lie that she left me for another guy it wasn’t because of my smell that made her wish me to hell it wasn’t because of my attitude even though she said i was pretty rude it wasn’t even my hygene when I was filthy and she was clean I’m really […]

    2-couple-not-talking-640

Buy A Tux from Tuxedocanada.com

If you’re looking to buy a nice tux, then you are in luck i just launched a shop to buy a tux, its the top you can get jackets, pants, shirts and a vest but it’s the prices that you will like best. This is just a cheesy ad for the new site i’m hoping […]

inspiration

The Inspiration For My Poetry

i’ve been thinking of some really sucky poems to post but people wonder if they are inspired by my life the most Then I have to think twice about writing tons of stuff like mommy and daddy not loving me enough or the years i spent locked in a cellar and how about the beatings, […]

2-couple-not-talking-640

How We Ended Up Like This

It wasn’t because of my lie that she left me for another guy it wasn’t because of my smell that made her wish me to hell it wasn’t because of my attitude even though she said i was pretty rude it wasn’t even my hygene when I was filthy and she was clean I’m really […]

BA64470

My Dream Job

I want a job and i want to work i want a paycheck and i want the perks i want a nice office and a cushy chair i want to give orders and decide what’s best I want to do research, development and test I want bonuses and lots of vacation I want to have […]

drunk shots face

Have a Little Shot (Parody of Beyonce’s “All the Single Ladies”)

And then you throw up
throw up in the club, I just blew chuncks
people all stare at me
i took another sip, then i took a slip
cause the ground was covered like a sea

letter with feather

Evolution of the letter: From Letters to Twitter

Dear Mr. So and So, i’m writing this letter to let you know that I have one little thing i need to ask but writing this letter is quite the task I have to break it up into paragraphs at best write an intro, a conclusion and fill in the rest because it would be […]

idiot-41423

Survival of the Fittest & Natural Selection

    Survival of the fittest and natural selection Did Darwin think it would take us in the right direction? With the smartest reproducing and the dumb dying out We’d be a civilization of geniuses without a doubt But all of a sudden we discover accurate birth control And with this little pill, Darwin’s theory […]

What a Difference

no grass or space or parking spots to fields of green and humongous lots from 1 bedroom in a cramped structure to 2 floors of space and no need to rupture the peace of mind that space brings in this new place, i feel like i have wings I spent 7 years in NY and […]

Web 2.0 Giving Free Value: Parody of U2’s With or Without You

See the blog post on your site See your tweet is quite all right I wait for your value Read your content and start to rate Hope my comment is not too late And I wait to give value With your free value I’ll give free value you post each day three times or four […]

penny.jpg

What is a Penny Worth?

Is a penny worth anything anymore? people don’t even bother to pick them up off the floor They’re not worth the effort or the “luck” because you need 100 of them just to get a buck stores barely use the penny and hate to accept it try paying in only pennies and they’ll throw a […]